My last post in the September Challenge with a Twist…a tribute to a great man.

I was in church when I got the news that my beloved bab’omdala had passed on. I remember my heart jumping out of my chest and a cold sensation passing over my face. After battling a long illness, being in and out of hospitals for years and staying strong for everyone, he had finally left this world. He fought a good fight, I must say.

But, I’m not going dwell too much on that chapter of his life. That’s not what he’d want. That’s not what I want. I want to celebrate:

The Disciplinarian
Bab’omdala was a disciplinarian. Not because he went off on you when you did something wrong, no. Sometimes he didn’t have to reprimand you. You’d reprimand yourself because you’d be afraid of letting him down. He didn’t have to raise his voice. His soft, quiet but firm voice would put you in your place very fast. I think I speak for the whole family when I say that we had to check ourselves before we presented ourselves to him.

The Truth Teller
Human beings are greatly flawed and someone had to tell us when we were going left instead of right. Bab’omdala was that person. Old Mack had bars for days. He didn’t care if you got angry. If you needed to be checked, he gladly checked you. He knew his timetable well: there was a time to be quiet and a time to talk. I pity those who got checked because I’m pretty sure they will never forget what he had to say to them. What made it worse was his tone…ever so quiet but full of tough love. And the craziest part is, he was always right. Always.

The Teacher
The very fact that he was interested in all our career prospects speaks volumes about the man he was. I remember when I started my degree at NUST and how he told me how proud he was of me. He said that I was “completing the set”.

I remember being anxious for the next 4 years because of that. I kept thinking, what if I don’t “complete the set”? What if I let him down by dropping the baton stick? Looking back, I realise that I took his message the wrong way. He wasn’t trying to traumatise me. He was setting a standard. He was giving me a goal. I’m so glad I gave it my best shot because I graduated with good grades and I passed through “headquarters” to show him I had done it. The set was complete.

The Support System
Bab’omdala was always on my family’s side. He wanted us to win. All the time. He celebrated our every achievement. He would go to war for us and when attacks came from all directions, he’d shield us with one hand and use the other to fight. When I got the message about his passing, my first thought was, who will fight for us now? It’s nice to have someone looking out for you and to us, Bab’omdala did a great job of it; our knight in shining armour.

The Super Dad
In our Ndebele culture, your father’s brother is your father. Bab’omdala was a super dad. He was wise and it was the kind of wisdom that comes with age and a genuine love for people. He had the whole family history at the palm of his hand and he was very fond of re-telling it, especially stories about my dad.

Bab’omdala was a uniting force. If there was family meeting, we knew it would be at his house. Family party – at his house; disciplinary hearing – his house. He loved having people around him (that’s one of the things I got from him) and you never walked away from him without learning something new.

There’s a big gap where he used to be

I’m going to miss him. His warmth, his wisdom, his love and his support – I will miss it all. He passed away 5 days before his 80th birthday. He changed a lot of lives and his footprints will never be erased from the face of the earth. He is survived by the most beautiful and intelligent children I know (damn, my brothers and sisters are stunning). He taught us timeless lessons.

All the speakers at his burial said the same things about him: he was a God-fearing man, an excellent teacher (by profession and by calling) and a great father. I agree completely.

Lala ngokuthula, baba omdala, qhawe lako Moyo, qhawe lami.